#MyWordForToday is #Pedestals
I am not watching Big Brother Nigeria, but I can tell you the names of housemates because it is the hottest show at the moment, everyone is talking about it.
What I find most fascinating though, is how people elevate their favourite housemates and root for them. This is the same way we elevate our Pastors, Imams, Teachers etc and place them on a mental Podium.
What is a pedestal? it is mentally elevating an individual in our minds or subconscious to a certain level and setting explicit expectations on them.
When they fall short of our assumptions (recall that they didn’t ask for elevation in the first place) we become so disappointed in them. Does this sound familiar?
It is not unhealthy to look up to individuals, we all need heroes or mentors, but even heroes need some downtime.
As it is said, “our heroes have feet of clay”. We human beings are complex, we are prone to our failures and flaws. We are paradoxes, carrying in us two opposing truths: Good and Evil Characters.
So you see when you place people on pedestals, you deny them the grace of failing, you forget that blood runs through their veins like you, they sleep, shit, yawn, fart, have sex, struggle, bath, fail and die just like you.
Being respectful of a person and putting them on a 3legged pedestal are two distinct things.
No matter the station of an individual in life, we must be gracious and fair to ourselves. We should never look down on anybody, nor should we revere anyone.
Want to know why? It stops you from having an open mind towards that person you so venerate and this can be counter-productive because no matter how evil an individual is, we have a thing or two to learn from them.
Yorubas are wont to say “there is nary a bad child without their own good days” meaning that a bad person has their useful days so let's not throw away the baby with the bathwater, likewise we cannot consistently place people on a pedestal that they might drop from.
Let me end this piece by saying when we set others on a pedestal, we are deprived of not only perceiving them as they truly are, but also of knowing ourselves deeply.
People will be who they are regardless of what you assume about them, and what you assume about them does not change who they are in the least - it only changes your perceptions of them.
Namaste 🙏🏽
Bibireosefowora
Your Quirky Coach.
